my feeling

I don't know why am i write today...
I feel so sad right now...
maybe it is time to let go my wushu ...
I do miss but i can't hold it forever i know , one day i also have to let go ..
This is the first time i write my blog until my tears drop...
Why am i drop my tears.... ?
Maybe i played too long and i started to miss this life even i haven't quit .
I always ask myself why i play wushu until so long...
izit because of my friend that why I'm still playing...
The real reason is i can't let go ...
i trained already 12 years... I spent 12 years for wushu...
End up what i get ? the life of athlete will anyone understand ?
I also wish to enjoy life with my friend work play and hangout together .
But all i have is to see and listen what they talk and they mention about .
my life is just always stay in the room or training ...
Do anyone really understand the feeling ...
I don't think so ... even coach also doesn't understand my feeling because they are just wanna protect the place they have , they never think the life how we athlete were really are ...